Lost Gay Love Part 7

So it's official.  DOMA lost the votes 5-4.  This is just one step closer to equality.  Now that this has happened it has opened up another can of worms in my relationship.  My partner came home and as I figured he had to say something about the matter.  I had my opinions and he had his.  Yet in the throwing of opinions to each other I could still see that the matter of marriage did not matter much to him.  On that subject as quickly as it came up it dispersed into the air.

Yesterday I mentioned the matter of adoption and how I was about to go get a pamphlet on the matter of adoption.  In doing so I noticed his facial expression change as though it was another thing that he had to deal with and not in a good way.  So I have come to the conclusion that no matter what I do this relationship is rooted in one way and no matter what the tree above the roots will not bend or twist to any other ideas blown its way.  I have made the decision to move out once I have obtained enough funds to do so.  I believe that my happiness needs to be replanted and regrown with the love that I once had for myself.  This unhappiness that I have gotten to know with in the last few months has made me think of all the things that I have done wrong in this relationship.  My fault in this relationship is loving to much and putting my happiness in a box in the closet when I should have had it open to grow.

Though I may not have children at this time, I fight for the child that I do not have, but will have soon.  And after I have learned to be happy with myself one day I will be able to find a love that will make me just as happy as I do him and hear bells ring.

To Equality!!!

Sincerely,

Mister M